A year ago, a woman so full of grace, took the most peaceful of naps and woke up in heaven holding hands with the love of her life.
I’m amazed once again at the meaning of and passing of time.
Heard the news from my brother at 5:40am that day and gave Heidi an extended bear hug and exhaled. Tears were not my first instinct.
We had a lineup of big doctor’s appointments for our oldest that day (she’s ok) and yet I was eerily calm because I knew in my heart of hearts that my Mom was already busy generously sharing her divine grace with me.
The Holy Spirit was present in so many ways and so strongly (and in the days leading up to it) that my reflex was just to laugh and shake my head. I laughed and shook my head over and over again as I pictured my Mom already showing off until it got to the point it was way too much. The earthly angels helping us that day were making such superhuman efforts to show us love that it just blew my mind and I had to walk straight to the men’s bathroom and howl like a baby.
Ever since that day, that feeling of my Mom being so with me has ebbed and flowed but never gone away. Thank you for that gift, Mom.
Sitting quietly for a few minutes on the back porch. Watching the birds swoop in and around the bird feeder. Seeing Heidi or one of Mom’s grandkids light up the room with their laughter and beautiful smiles. Going for a long walk with Heidi. One look over at our golden Clancy sleeping peacefully in his corner also does the trick. I take a deep breath when I need it the most and feel the warm glow of my Mom’s loving presence.
My Mom exhibited many superpowers over the course of her life but one of the most inspiring in her later years was her overly abundant gratitude for something as simple as a Diet Coke from McDonalds. Overly abundant because that trip to Mt. Sinai earlier in the day for yet another round of chemo never even got mentioned when asked “How’s your day going, Mom?” Instead, she’d say,
“Well Joe brought me a Diet Coke from McD’s today and it tastes absolutely delicious so I’m having a great day!”
So I hit the McD’s drive thru on my way home on the one year anniversary of her grace filled Irish exit and happily ordered my large Diet Coke in Maureen’s honor and raised a toast to one of the most loving, fun and encouraging human beings to ever walk this Earth.
My Mom was a constant cheerleader and a fountain of unconditional love for me and my whole family. That kind of love doesn’t just stop. It keeps on going and giving in ways that we just can’t fully understand, yet. My Mom’s unconditional love is one of the biggest reasons why I’ve felt and will always feel like the luckiest guy in the world.
My crew and I miss her a ton but to my Mom’s credit, it’s pretty damn clear what she wants for each and every one of us.
Actively seek out those little moments of joy and pleasure. Pick up the phone. Write the letter. Send the email. Read that book. Have that lunch. Send those flowers. Order that gift. Take that nap. Savor that meal. Treat yo’ self. Go for that walk. Watch that movie. Invite them over. Whip up that yummy dinner. Smile as big as you can. Look ‘em in the eyes. Flash that beautiful smile again so big that your cheeks almost close your eyes. Listen with your whole being. Encourage. Hug. Play that song. Dance while you can. This loving thing is EVERY thing.
Oh yeah…and Go Yankees!!!